The first time I heard the word "abuse" was from the website of my friend Scott Nute in 2005. The word "abuse" related to him had remained in my mind. He was abused and suffered from the stress for years. On his recently renewed the website, the story is still there.
Twenty years ago, a co-worker told me the story of her only son. Her husband would hang the son up on the door and take of his waist belt slashing him whenever the son would not behave as he expected. She could not help her son because she was also scared of her husband. she recalled every case about how her husband treated her son. I felt very sorry for her and did not realize that there could be a case of abuse.
One of my classmates was raised up by her grandparents. she was brought to her parents when we were about 12 years old. she would not go home after school but would instead go to other classmate's home without telling her parents. Her parents would look for her. One a time, she would not come to school for three days and was hiding in the classmate home. We all knew her mother would ask her do lot chores, and that if her did not get good grades, the mom would beat her. she showed us the bruises on her body. however, we did not realize this could be the case of abuse. It happened often because during those days, disciplining children by physical means from parents, and even teachers was not forbidden.
After I got a job in United Stated. I went to training on "abuse and neglected". I learned the word "abuse".
Based on the research, the stress from abuse was a type of toxic stress. This type of stress might cause brain injury, especially when the brain is developing while people are in their early childhood period.
In Scott's case, he was healed by the grace of God. In the second case, the boy died in a motorcycle accident. In the third case, my classmate did not get into the college and could not meet her parents' expectations. she was very shy and introverted later. her family moved to another province while I was in my third year of college. We, all my old classmates, did not have any information about her, even though we still remembered her. We would mention her every time we had a classmate reunion.
Reference
CDC, The Effects of Childhood Stress on Health Across the Lifespan
Harvard, Toxic Stress: the Facts
Scott, Sexual Abuse