"Human relationships, and the effects of relationships on relationships, are the building blocks of healthy development" (Shonkoff & Phillips, 2000, p. 4).Tianxuan and Kaiyang: these are the friends I made during my college time and still remain till today. We met 34 years ago. We lived in the same room at college’s dormitory for 4 years. Relationship among us has been getting closer and closer since then compare to the relationship with others. Why? I looked back, what factors affect this relationship? How it last almost 30 years? In our room at the college dormitory, there were 7 girls lived together. I lost the connection with one who was my best friend among them. Due to the way that keep us in touch is more difficulty. Tianxuan and Kaiyan were not my best friends at that time. However, we can connect very easy, through phone. I kept their home phone, and cell phone even it changed time and time. We keep in touch within the social media such as QQ and Facebook and Linkedin and circle in each other. During my difficulty time, I called them and discussed my issue with them. Also, they share their issue with me. I feel they trust me as I trust them. Many years experiences make us knowing each other better and better. Our relationship become strong and stronger.
Yihong, a classmate I met when I was new born. We were in the same daycare and grow up at the same place till graduated from high school. Last year I visited my parents. My parents told me that she met her sometimes. She would ask my parents about me. I went her home to visit her; I still had the feeling as we were childhood friend. We talked about everything that remain in our memory. What happened in this relationship, I had other three classmates with whom we were in the same daycare and grow up at same place until we graduated from high school. However, Yihong is the one I could call on whenever I want and will not get rejected nor disrespected. I feel she cares about me. A child from a new family came to our preschool program. I knew there would be an anxious of separation at the first couple weeks, the first day the child and his mom entered the classroom, it was breakfast time, I led the child and parent sat the table. I asked the mom the very based information about her, and I share the same information about me while we sat the same table, we immediately built the trust between us and it passed to the child. the child would not cry and felt more comfortable at my present. I experienced that building a friend relationship can happen at the moment and it helps child reduce the anxious of separation.
These three cases are the reflection of the building relationship skills which are listening, demonstrate concern and empathy, respect, and respond thoughtfully in emotionally intense interactions, and understand (Edelman, 2004).